An Introvert's Inner World

 These are the paintings I am just now finishing.  I have been thinking a lot about introverts because I'm raising one, and am one myself.  The world inside is so vast and rich, but can't be seen by everyone.  One must be to be worthy to be let in that door.

 These paintings are mixed media= oil and encaustic.  I've been doing the background and the portraits in oils and the interior painted symbolism with encaustic.

My favorite thing about painting this way is the transparency and layers. Lends itself to work of a psychological/ meditative nature.

New series inspired in part by books.

                                            Coalesce

                                          Entwine

Returning to the Source

The 3 paintings above are finished examples of the new series of paintings I've been working on. It all started about 6 months ago.  I wanted to exploit my favorite things about using oil paints, and encaustics, and do it in the same piece.  The way these two mediums look so different intrigued me and I wanted to build them one layer over the other.  First with oils I build up the background colors.  I mix cold wax medium into the oil paints which thins them out and gives them a translucent buttery consistency.  After painting one layer of color, I use sandpaper and turpentine to lighten areas and remove some paint, then add the next layer.  This background process takes time because each layer needs to dry before it can be manipulated and painted on, and that can take a few days.  I've been wanting to do some figurative work with oils, mainly to express some characters from books that I love and also hybridized real life characters.  I want these paintings to be very peaceful and poetic but also philosophical.  It can take a while to paint the person just right, and then to figure out what else belongs in the painting to express the emotions there.  The best thing for me has been taking my time with this process and waiting until the paintings speak to me.  I find life to be layered and enigmatic and I'm trying to express this.  I want  to build translucent layers of imagery, as well as add mixed media elements to my work. The goal is to create a layered surface to emphasize dimensionality. This technique lends itself to work concerning the imagined realm.

 This one above is one that I have just finished.  She reminds me of a character from one of the Russian novels that I've been enjoying lately.  The whole thing is painted with oils except the green lines encircling her and the birds, incised encaustic line.

 Here are some new new ones with mostly only one layer.  Stay tuned to see what happens with these!

A close up of a painting with a couple layers of background paint.  

Draw, Draw, Draw!

Sketchbooks organize image chaos by making it sequential and binding it together.  I have complete freedom to make no sense whatsoever in these books I created while at Penland this past summer.   Some use drawing as  tool to help plan compositions for more ambitious work.  I do the opposite, I tend to see it as a way to unplan for my paintings.  Imagination needs freedom without pressure to conform to a plan.  

Duality.

Duality is '... a single conceptual unit that is formed by two inseparable and mutually constitutive elements whose inherent tensions and complementarity give the concept richness and dynamism' (Wenger 1998, p. 66).

 I had finished the piece on the left as part of the Magic Strata series I collaborated on with Alison Overton.  It's kind of an enchanted forest at night painting. The one on the right I'm still working on.  It's more of a day painting.

 Two more unfinished ones, part of my castle series. It seems like the breeze in the painting on the right is blowing into the painting on the left. Maybe a continuity there. I'm still waiting on my next installment of ideas to finish these two.

 Sketchbook paintings.  I'm enjoying working in the books I made at Penland.

 It's super relaxing to just let my mind go a bit in these books.  There's a sense of freedom in there.

 New paints, new paints.  I love all these colors together.

 Two new encaustic backgrounds...

Penland!!!

 Penland is like a magical fairytale land for any artist.  Beautiful enchanted surroundings and resources to create.  The best part is yoga twice a day and delicious food at every meal so you don't have to think about what you'll eat.  People are great there, I made such lovely friends and had such a great time.

 I found myself not sleeping a whole lot, and not missing my sleep.  There is an energy there.  Everything seems to sparkle, maybe its because of the mica.  Everything is so lush and beautiful and it doesn't get hot and muggy in the mountains or at least it didn't while I was there.

 It was amazing that there was nothing to do but focus on creating for two whole weeks.  No distractions, no tvs!  It was a much needed break for me.  As much as I missed my family and little one I appreciated the time I had to do my own thing.  I must thank the United Arts Council that gave me the grant to make this trip possible.

 Here are some of the books I made while there.  They have "signature covers" or colorful papers that cover and protect each section of white paper. I used super nice paper and loved the effect of putting a book together with the torn edges and having the variation of edges of paper.

 You have to do a lot of measurements to make a book.  Measuring and right angles are usually not my thing, but I found with the right tools and a large workspace anything is possible.  So I learned to care about numbers a little.  These are all sketchbooks that I'll fill with drawings and watercolors and glue things in.  Homes for ideas to live in.

 This one is for our studio, for people to write comments in.

 I used masking fluid and gouache to paint this plaid pattern.

 Watercolor is so relaxing to do....

 Beautiful NC mountains.  I miss you already.

 Here's one I made for my friend and fellow artist Lisa who I visited in Asheville.

 These are all coptic bindings.  I learned other binding styles but this is my favorite.  I love how the spine looks all naked.

It's between me and my muse.

“On that night the sky laid bare its internal construction in many sections which, like anatomical exhibits, showed the spirals and whorls of light, the pale-green solids of darkness, the plasma of space, the tissue of dreams… 

— Bruno Schulz, The Street of Crocodiles

I  was talking with a fellow artist about are most frequently asked question- "Where do you get your ideas/inspiration?"  We were laughing about different ways to blow off this very difficult question.  "I can't reveal that information for fear of damaging the fragile relationship between me and my muse."

The truth is to fully answer this is impossible.  To even try I would have to get somewhat metaphysical.   I will suffice to say that I try to keep an open mind, inspiration somedays bursts from everything I see, weeds, burnt out buildings,  dirt, trees.  Somedays it's better just not to try to paint.  Some days I can resolve multiple ideas.  Other ideas take a while on the back burner.  The mermaid oil painting is on the back burner at this point.  It's almost done, just a hair away, but needs something that I can't come up with just yet.  My interests and direction are in wax right now and I'm not worried because there's nothing I can do.  My muse would never steer me wrong.  

An overlay on these two faces.  More plants, bugs, jewels?  

I can't talk about this one too much, it's a secret painting that won't be revealed until November.  Suffice to say I'm having so much fun with the wax here.  This painting has a long history and is finally coming into its own.

Here's one that I am done with now, a meditative piece.

An artist is a dreamer consenting to dream of the actual world.

-George Santayama

I've been working on this painting incrementally with oils.  I got some comments that the figure in the foreground looks like me, so I changed it, I'm not trying to make a self portrait.  She's holding a shell that I found in Ireland.  Standing at the edge of her world looking out.  

These two represent the series of four that I'm working on.  I am doing buildings on transparent paper to show the oil painting once sealed on with wax.  The faces and backgrounds are painted with oil using a lot of cold wax medium.  Then sealed with clear encaustic wax and clouded by a building drawing.  Old structures with souls.  

 While I have been painting, my little artist has been busy with inks, acryilcs, watercolors, water soluble crayons and colored pencils.

Homages

 These are all ideas I've had for this painting kind of spontaneously this weekend. The cat's dark house.  Mystery and alchemy.

 I've been looking a lot at Russian painted facades.  I love the detail.  This house is walled from the sea, as in my previous painting.

 A mermaid in the ocean.

 She holds a seashell.

 Ever faithful and stoic companion.  Sees all, knows all and is silent.

 Homage to the blues.  Inspired by Mississippi John Hurt.

Homage to Van Gogh.

Turbulence and calm

The latest oil painting I am working on started as just colors.  The top picture was taken just as the imagery began to emerge from the abstraction. Then I changed the composition and changed the dog. Just trying to stay loose with this one.  I'll put in a swimmer in the ocean eventually.  After painting the last cityscape- Bee City, I have wanted to work more with painting water.  Not sure what I'll put at the top of the hill yet, maybe a statue.  I love working with the combination of orange and blue in the water.

 

This is a series of four paintings I am working on in panel.  They are all oil right now but I am planning to do the next phase in encaustic.  I find that I like painting faces better in oils right now.  The subject seems to be serenity, meditation, communing with nature, and inner worlds.  I did lots of thin washes with oils to get the effects.  The birds pulling strands of hair and hat are symbolism.  They could symbolize a thought or group of thoughts that tugs the brain.   

Faces.

I am almost almost done with this painting.  I am obsessing over faces now.  And other details.  I seem to be dragging out the  process because I don't want it to end- painting this has been so much fun.  To me, a face needs to show individuality and emotion, even if painted really tiny.  That's why I've done and redone these people, painted over and over their faces  five or more times.  I want them to look like people I might know even if they aren't portraits.  That, and making sure everyone's eyes nose and mouth are done convincingly.  Also even at this stage background colors change.  I am never afraid to mess up what I have already painted if it isn't right.  Luckily I haven't had to do anything huge to this one, just trying to get enough different shades of green and create contrast where I need it.  Good contrast with background colors is how small narrative details show and are noticed.  Details need details too. Branches need highlights and leaves too.  I like my trees quirky and Suess-ian.  Those have taken a long time and are almost finished.  Also, I need more birds on the line!!!

On a side note I have been taking a bookmaking class at Pullen Art Center to learn the coptic stitch. Here are the results of my efforts.  I won a grant to go to Penland this summer to study bookmaking.  My interest in books goes way back.  In art school my sketchbook was a private haven, a world unto myself that was never critiqued and never due.  I created these massive intense books with collage and drawings.  They would go everywhere I went and I was drawing constantly.  

There has always been a thread of narrative in  my work and I also want to explore that.  I'm not sure where the bookmaking interest will take me but it's something I've always wanted to learn.  

Almost Done!

It's easy to obsess over small details.  I love the idea of each section being its own "mini painting".  I try to made sure everything has been considered, wether I've chosen to refine it or leave it loose.  I'm in the process now of adding some flourishes to this one to give it a unique flavor.  My clients have inspired me with stories and objects they find meaning in.  I love to include details that will give them a closer connection with their painting.  When doing a commission, I consider that the client will spend lots of time with this painting for years to come.  That's kind of heavy if you think about it too hard, the bottom line is they've trusted me to give the painting life.  I appreciate that.  Anyway, some would call this the tedious stage of the painting.  It's a bit more tiring to do focus on the micro.  At the end of the day though, the micro doesn't matter if the macro doesn't work.  I have to remember that and edit.  Also from time to time I have to take a break, it gets so wet that it smears because I tend to rest my hand on it while painting with the tiny brush.  I'm really excited about this one, and I'd say now it's 90% done. 

Life is the details.

I have started the more narrative stage of this painting this past week, which means I have scaled down to a much smaller brush.  I'm trying to add the things that will give this painting its personality and develop its stories, but at the same time I'm trying keep some areas more brushy and "free".  I have been a little overwhelmed with all the ideas I'm getting for this painting, luckily I can't paint fast enough to include them all.  The faces and bodies of people have been roughed in and some refined further.  As I go through the process of refining, I also strive to keep some of the abstract brushier bits from previous stages.  

A bee monument

I admit that finding the differences in this series of progression of the painting will be daunting.  The top image is the most recent.  Before I started working on this painting I took a moment to note the colors I had used, and what colors the painting needed.  I like to take some time preparing my palette before digging in.  I mix the colors I think the painting needs, in general.  Then, I mix lighter or darker shades of them.  Then more vibrant versions, and more muted.  I like to have a balanced color palette before even getting started.  

I am selectively adding details at this stage.  Architectural details, cars, trees and sketches of people.  Each building takes on a personality.  Some are more apparent to me than others, so they get their details first, while others take a while to come forth.  I am putting a statue in the middle of the park, it's going to be a bee getting nectar from a flower.  At this stage in the painting the narrative begins to form....

Idealistic world

 The really nice thing about painting a city from your mind is everything can be vibrant.  The city is the framework for people to reach their potentials and expand their minds.  The space that the architecture creates is where all the exciting things in life happen.  Books are written, inventions invented, all for the greater good.  There are little or no constraints.
I've never been a "reality  painter".  I would rather paint things as I think they should be.  No homelessness.  No hunger.  Equality. No ugly strip malls!  No historic buildings torn down in order to have a bigger parking lot.
This past week I concentrated on putting a first layer of color on everything.  Buildings will change color, some may change shape.  I needed to have everything somewhat solid so I could see what I was dealing with.  Oh, and I took the bridge out, I'm going with docks instead. This phase of the painting I get to have a lot of fun mixing colors.  Every phase is fun.

Imaginary city comes to life with color.

This weekend in the studio I spent more time thinking about things than actually painting, but still managed to paint some.  At this phase, it's good to sit with the painting and slowly make the changes it needs, as the needs present themselves to me.  I keep going back and forth about how I want the bridge, and still am not done figuring that out.  I keep adding buildings behind buildings.  I've started putting some color in.  Trying hard to refrain from painting details at this stage but it's hard.  I see so many possibilities.  I do love the detail part but that comes later- I've learned from the past that too many details too soon can ruin the composition.

Happy Spring!

Sketching out and composing a city of the mind.

Not to go on and on about it, but I really get frustrated with computers, and trying to use them.  I have a suspicion that making a slideshow to put on your blog is alarmingly simple to do, since I see them around the internet all the time, but the skill eludes me.... so here are some photos in sequence of the progress I have made on my cityscape painting.  This is a commissioned painting for a family that likes my cityscapes and wants to give their living space a fun urban feel.  I think a lot about the book I read on urbanism- A Pattern Language.  My dad gave the book to Keith a few years ago for Christmas.  My Dad is an architect, and Keith is an "armchair city planner", so this gives them something in common.  The book is a great read, and presents ideas on what makes cities livable, and alive.  I try to remember these ideas when I'm laying out one of my city painting.  These are cities of the mind, and they also need to be alive and give the mind places to wander.  They need nooks and crannies.  The buildings need personalities.
At this point in the painting, compositional changes may still happen.  I like the idea of a walled city on a river.  I haven't done one like this yet.  I love to put bridges in my paintings.  And the bridge in this one has already changed since the photo was taken. There will be an open park in the center where I'll put some people and perhaps dogs.  There are a lot of covered porches in this one, so there will be of course people hanging out on them.  I hate it when some one has a great big beautiful porch but you never see them out enjoying it.  So I'm excited to start adding more color, but need to spend some time with this composition and make sure it's working.  

Beginning of a new painting.

So, I don't pretend to know a lot about computers. Half of the time I love technology and the other half I really hate it.  But I do know enough to do what I need to do and if not there's Keith.  

Anyway, I'm starting a new painting, a biggish one, and I'm psyched to be back using oils.  Not like I ever left.  I had this idea to shoot pictures of it every so often while I paint.  I have seen stuff like this on youtube and love to watch it. The idea was to play these pictures really fast in a slideshow set to the music I was listening to while I painted.  I did figure out how to make a slide show using this thing, but only on the side bar.  And I couldn't figure out how to set it to music or make it bigger but it is a start and maybe one day I will figure these things out.  But I digress.....

So the best thing about starting a new large canvas are the limitless possibilities.  The best thing about painting sky is that I love abstract painting.  The best thing about painting a sky with oils is that they stay wet for hours and you can really blend your colors.  And think about how you want it to look. Paint some more then go get some chai.  And paint some more, add some colors.  

This painting will be a cityscape and most of the sky will be covered up by buildings and such.  Over time I have found I like to paint the sky first so it is one continuous sky and I don't have to paint it in around the buildings and in between every twig leaf bird or squirrel in the painting.  That method is a little bit tedious.  Also the best way to warm up a canvas is to really cover it good.  

So, as you watch my primitive slideshow, you can also listen along:

We are all castles.

This is one of two that I started with oils.  I painted the background with oils because I was looking for a smoother color transition.  Also I painted the women with oils as well.  Once the oil paintings were dry, I superimposed drawings over the faces.  The drawings were done with ink on rice paper.  The idea is to create physical layers that express the layers in psyche.

The second in this series, next to an oil painting I am working on.

 Traveling..... mentally anyway.

 Here are the two women inside their mentally constructed castles.

 Later that day I added a bird and vines and a flower to this one.

 Bugs and flowers here, along with flying birds.  This one has a very radial composition.

January, month of re- envisioning.

This painting had been hanging out in the studio for a while, supposedly "done", when I started having new ideas for it.  I wanted to try out a stencil pattern idea, so I worked a little more in the sky.  It was leaning against the wall, in flux, with me not sure what to do next.  

The great thing about my art friends is they are all pretty generous about sharing ideas.  I've had friends help me out of some sticky situations many a time with my work.  Sometimes fresh eyes can see the obvious in a painting more clearly.  I love it when my friends name my work for me because this can often be the hardest part for me.  

The great thing about being married to an artist is there is always someone to ask.  Keith gave me the great idea to paint a floating city.  I'm having so much fun using mixed media for this too.  Rice paper, fabric, National Geographic photos, ect.  I'm also building up the clear to create a hazy sensation.   See this one in its previous incarnation

.

 . This one has taken a long time to come about.  It has a long way yet to go I think.  Some are fast, some are slow.  

 This is a diptych I had finished over a year ago.  The more I looked at it, the more I thought there was something missing but I couldn't figure out what.  Then, one day, I did.  I had painted it in oils, but I decided to go back over it with encaustic.  The I used the squirrel I had cut from a linoleum tile I had cut.
See its previous incarnation. 

 Cheers until next time!

Nostalgia

 Two collages I did back in college.  I was just talking with good friend and fellow artist, Claire Stringer, who went to school with me back in the day.  We would sit for hours cutting up these national geographics to create surreal scenes and poetry.  Then we created several art "manifestos" that we distributed.  I just loved doing these, I felt like I was talking through some one else's mouth.  It was my creation, but a bit removed from the paintings I was doing for class.  I spent lots of spare time on these, and I always had my nose in my sketchbook.  I felt more free in these mediums, because they were just for me, I didn't have to justify anything to anyone, unlike the oil paintings I would offer up for critique every week.  The collages became pretty elaborate, and the sketchbooks as well.  It was kind of like a secret life.

 Here are exerpts of two oil paintings I am working on right now.  Adding layers of color.  When I am done painting the figures, I'll finish the paintings with wax.

 Recently finished encaustic paintings----